Don't Ever Come to Paris in July - Or at Least Never on Bastille Day Weekend

It seems that every French bumpkin decides to vacation in Paris in July. Combine that will Bastille Day Weekend - July 11 to July 14 - add a Sunday - and you have a French recipe for disaster.

We just came back from a Sunday afternoon at Versailles. The palace there is beautiful - but the crowds and lines are unbearable. If it weren't Lulu's birthday - I would have stormed our of there in a huff. I hate the Saturday afternoon crowd at Governors Square Mall back home. Multiply that by 1000 and you get an idea of what it is like. We were in line to buy tickets for the Louis XIV palace about two full hours. The line snaked back and forth into infinity. Then after you paid 13 Euros for admission you had to get into another line for about 1/2 hours to get inside. After that - the line extended all the way through the palace.

There was very little rule enforcement and many folks kept butting into the line. After a while I got tired of being a traffic cop. Once in the palace - you could not see the "no flash allowed" signs because of all the tourists insisting on capturing every chair in digital lightning bursts to bore the folks back home.

Our hotel is about one block from the Bastille and Tuesday is Bastille Day - their excuse for the 4th of July. On that day the people stormed the castle right where we are staying - and they started one of their many numbered governments. I had to chuckle when I saw a pictures in Versailles (Versailles?) of De Gaulle marching into Paris in 1944. In my opinion - the French were right about Hussein and Iraq - but not much else. Even a stopped watch is right twice a day.

Don't even get me started about the toilet facilities. It is an absolute disgusting shame the way they make women wait in line to use the john. Lulu and I had the pleasure of using the same squalid bathroom in the subway. There is something disconcerting about staring women in the eye as you use the urinal. I didn't mind it and enjoyed making a real good "aaaah" relief face as the women watched in line in jealousy - but Lulu was always lost in a line for the toilet.

Many of Lulu's students are doing essays comparing London to Paris. One of the biggest differences is graffiti - Paris is covered with it and I am guessing that the 24 hours a day video cameras in London have helped wipe it out. When we visited London and Paris 10 years ago -the scribble marking status is reversed.

Lulu and I visited France in April 2001 for the Easter Weekend. She found a package deal of hotel and plane for $400 per person. Not only were we in a hotel from heaven - but we had Paris to ourselves. So - if you are planning to visit the French - mind the calendar.

I would have loved to include picture but our Internet server is horrible too :-)