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Tuesday, October 07, 2008

Trailing Spouse and Noles Survives 5 Inches of Rain and $12 Beers

Lulu and I were already in South Florida for a visit to some of her students. Since we could see the Dolphins Stadium from our hotel window in Hollywood - we stuck around an extra day to cheer on the Noles against rival Miami. It was a beautiful sunny and breezy week - we figured it would be a great night for a game - even if we were playing the dreaded Canes.

After 4 days of beach weather - we woke up to rain pelting on our slanted windows. This was a herbinger of what was to come. We figured it would clear before the 3:30 game time and it did.

Just in case - on the way to the game Lulu insisted we find a dollar store and buy cheap ponchos. She has been right on this before so I paid the two dollars as we waded back into traffic.

As usual - we did not have any tickets - so we drove to the stadium at about 2 PM. I wished we would have walked because parking was $25 at the stadium. Moths flew out of my wallet as I counted out one dollar bills. The parking lot was festive. There were plenty of tailgating Hurricanes and a surprising number of Seminole flags and tents. One forgets that not all FSU fans live in Tallahassee. The banter between fans in orange and fans in garnet was mostly light-hearted.

About 30 minutes before game time - it started to rain hard. This is a very good sign for someone without tickets. Lulu and I walked to the ticket area - and both of us held up two fingers. We looked like refugees for a 60s peace rally. We must have been a sorry sight - because after a while a high school coach with a Hurricanes shirt on walked up and offered us a ticket for free. You had to go through the complimentary ticket line with him. Why not - Lulu went along with him. After a few minutes - a guy with a Noles jersey offered a single ticket for $20. When I told him that Lulu and I drove down from Tallahassee - he gave it to me for free.

Lulu and I rendez-voused - on the "other side." It was like going through the Berlin Wall - the way they frisked you there - separate lines for men and woman. Quite frankly - I would rather being frisked by the cute lady in the next line than the surly guy that did me. I notices there was one area that he did not frisk on old men. Good thing because that it where I stored my 4 bottles of coke. As planned - he did not touch me there. I could have fit a nuclear bomb there - this gives new meaning to "having a package." It was a good thing because beers in the stadium were $12 - more on that later.

We went up to the third level - it was still raining pretty hard as we circled that infinity spiral walkway. Lulu wanted to sit on the 50 yard line on the Noles side - but we got our numbers crossed and came out on the Canes 50. We saw two seats near the rail - it was 7 minutes before game time but we took a chance on those seats staying empty. We lucked out. No one ever came to claim those seats along with the other orange seats 20,000 empty seats in the stadium.

The rain was steady - but we were dry and warm in our thin layers of clear plastic. We smiled at each other smuggly. We were at the "big game" - in great seats - for free - unless you count the parking.

In a moment two skinny young ladies sat next to us. They seemed friendly and innocent enough. One turned out to be the Trojan horse. During the whole game - this 100 pound young lady that sat next to me - stood and screamed for the Canes the entire game. I thought she would tire out quickly. It was not just your regular yell - but a high pitched perfect high C note the whole game. Due to my poor hearing - I am not supposed to be able to hear that frequency. But it was like a miracle cure - I could hear again!

Enter the beers. This young lady half my wieght proceeded to buy and drink several of these giant quart size beers. They must have been medication for her throat because she did not miss a beat or an octave. She was a human siren. The guy on the other side said that she does this every game and it never ends.

At halftime she left - she stayed away through much of the third quarter. I thought she passed out somewhere. But she came back - this time holding two giant cups of confidence. I told her I missed her and asked her how much the beers cost. She said $12 a piece. I told her that two beers would use up my allowance for the week. She said she had to give the vendor $30 for two beers or he wouldn't respect her. My head exploded.

During the second half - FSU was frittering away a 21 point lead. I was convinced that this young lady was single-handedly stealing this game from the Noles.

Some unknown guy came to sit next to "the screamer." You could tell that they had never met before. First - he would high five her with every play. Then it turned to pecks on the cheek. After that - it turned to him pouring a few inches of her beer into his empty cup when she put her drink down. At a dollar an inch- this was highway robbery. Just when I thought she was too drunk to realize - she starting holding her drink. Smart girl - but he left.

Finally - with one minute left and the Canes within 2 points - the heavens opened up. It poured harder than I ever felt before - but we kept dry in our "dry cleaner bag" quality rainwear. The Noles held on.

The parking lot was flooded - we were up to our ankles in the warm sloshing mess. Most Nole fans expected a different ending - and were relieved that the swamp was just water.

The sportscaster after the game said we had 5 inches of rain as I sank into a steaming hot bath at our hotel. We got back without incident even without the aid of traffic cops. Fans had already started turning into a game for the ages. The Seminole slide seemed to start on a rainy Thursday in Louisville - maybe this storm will awaken the dynasty ghosts.

The Seminoles won the game - we drove 10 hours home with smiles on our faces - tomahawk chopping cars all the way up Route US27. We were happy that the Noles hung on for the victory. But whenever I think of that game - I will always wonder where that skinny girl put $72.00 worth of beer. I guess the same place I put my four 25 cent Cokes.

Lulu asked me to remind you that I really made up the part about sneaking Cokes into the stadium - that would be wrong. Fans are obligated to buy their drinks in the stadium to support the Miami Hurricanes - even if beers are $12.00 each.

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